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User blog:Charlie the Penguin/Club Penguin July 2014 Press Conference Transcript
The following was transcribed from Club Penguin's recent press conference in Kelwona, Canada. Spike Hike: Hello everybody, thanks for coming. Me and my minion- I mean, fellow workers ''Polo Field and Megg... Megg... what's your last name, Megg? '''Megg:' Uh... Megg? Spike Hike: Fair enough then. As I was saying, me and my fellow workers Polo Field and Megg Megg are here to talk about this month's party, the Music Jam 2014! Silence Spike Hike: Uh, I said, the MUSIC JAM 2014!!! ' ''Silence '''Spike Hike: Uh, This is where you applaud... A few members of the audience'' clap awkwardly'' Spike Hike (sarcastically): 'Alright guys, settle down, please. '''Polo Field: '''Come on everyone, get psyched! We haven't had a Disney Channel-independent Music Jam since 2011! '''Megg: '''Uh... Polo? '''Polo Field: '''What? '''Megg: '''This party does have a Disney Channel tie-in... '''Polo Field: '''Oh yeah... well, this party will still be fun! '''Spike Hike: '*facepalm* Look everyone, we do listen to our fans, and we know how you feel about Disney Channel-based mascots. Because of this, we instead will only have Club Penguin original charaters at the Music Jam. Cadence... Crickets chirp 'Spike Hike: '...and the Penguin Band! Crickets chirp 'Spike Hike: '...For real this time! They won't be sprites, they will be actual mascots! Audience cheers 'Spike Hike: '''Now there's the applause I was looking for! See, there will be Disney Channel-based characters, but only as meetable sprites, like at the Muppets World Tour! ''Audience groans 'Spike Hike: '''Oh come on, the Muppets World Tour wasn't ''that ''bad, was it?! '''Megg: '''Even I can't pretend that I liked that party. There weren't enough peppermint stripes. '''Spike Hike: '''Would you cut it with the peppermint stripes, Megg?! '''Megg: '''But they're my trademark! '''Spike Hike: '''Exactly. Now don't make me regret ever approving the Megg Takeover back in December, the last thing your ego needs is more inflation! '''Megg: '''I don't have a big ego! *leans in towards microphone* Hey, that reminds me, who else thinks that I should be made into a mascot? ''One-third of the audience cheers 'Polo Field: '''Come on everyone, we have awesome guests at this party! Please welcome our special guests, Cole Plante... ''Some of the audience claps 'Polo Field: '...Zendaya... More of the audience begins to clap 'Polo Field: '...Sabraina Carpender... Audiance cheers 'Polo Field: '...and last but not least... 'Male Audience Member #1: '''MILEY CYRUS!! ''Drumroll 'Polo Field: '...Violetta! Awkward ten-second silence '''Male Audience Member #2: '''Who the ''are experiencing technical difficulties'' is that?! 'Megg: '''This is Martina Stoessel, better known as Violetta from the Argentine Disney Channel soap opera of the same name! '''Violetta: '''Pleasure to meet you. ''Crickets begin to chirp again 'Violetta: '''Tough crowd, I see. '''Random Audience Member (Gender Unknown): '''What the heck does Argentine mean? '''Cole Plante: '''Hey everyone, how are you today? '''Female Audience Member: '''He's so dreamy!! '''Megg: '''Hey, back off, he's mine! ''Awkward silence 'Megg: '''He's min... mi... m''y... ''Yes! He's ''my ''friend. '''Sabrina Carpender: '''Hello, everybody! It's great to be here, and I'm honored to be July's featured artist on the Club Penguin blog! '''Zendaya: '''Woah woah woah, how come Cole and Sabrina are featured? Why not me? '''Polo Field: '''Well, we kind of gave you a lot of spotlight when you played as Rocky during the Ultimate Jam... '''Zendaya: '''You think that they're better than me, don't you? '''Random Male Audience Member #3: '''She's going to have been two different characters on Club Penguin?! '''Violetta: '''What are you complaining about, Zen, I wasn't asked either. '''Spike Hike: '''AND that was our special guests for the Music Jam 2014, Cole Plante, Sabrina Carpender, Violetta, and Zendaya! '''Zendaya: '''Hey, you said my name last! ''Plante, Carpender, Zendaya, and Violetta are led away by security '''Megg: '''So... any questions? '''Female Audience Member #2: '''Why is Martina Stowestal or whatever her name is playing Violetta and not herself? '''Polo Field: '''Well, we were considering having Martina Stoessel play herself, but we figured that people would have a better chance of recognizing her if she came to the party as Violetta. '''Male Audience Member #4: '''Are you kidding me? Does Club Penguin even have any players from Argentina? '''Female Audience Member #3: '''Violetta won't fit in at all! Zendaya is playing someone in that new Disney Channel movie, but she's not playing her character! '''Spike Hike: Okay, does anyone have a question that isn't about Violetta? Silence 'Spike Hike: '...I didn't think so. Oh wait, you there in the back! What's your question? '''Little Girl in the Audience: '''Is it true you're having a My Little Pony Takeover? '''Spike Hike: '''OKAY, thank you everyone for coming to our conference! See you next month...! Or year...! Or never... Note: This is not to be taken seriously. -Charlie the Penguin: Don't just do something, stand there! 22:46, July 3, 2014 (UTC) Category:Blog posts